No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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