He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize