Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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