I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Randomize
