Whoa Z and x make the same sound
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
