So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
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