Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Randomize
