are you still at the devil's house?
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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