Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
