Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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