That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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