Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
