I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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