Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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