I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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