I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
My vagina is very pro this idea
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
