Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
