rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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