Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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