I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
this hospital has no fireball
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
