Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
