The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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