who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
