What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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