my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
