and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize