For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
