My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
He kissed a someone with a penis
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
