Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
do herpes really smell.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
