Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize