she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
