Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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