brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
