We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
