I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
not ubering you a puppy
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Your penis caused this!
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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