Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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