Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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