I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
