and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
