It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
