So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize
