Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
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