i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
