I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
im six kinds of drunk right now
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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