the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
