No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
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