you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Randomize
