i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
