your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
