I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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